As low as it gets

I sit alone here,

Deep in thought,

Vastly falling into a pool of sadness,

My emotions tattered and distraught,




A pool of sadness surrounds me,

Dragging me further into its pit,

Making my emotional and mental senses,

Uncooperative, Sedate, Unfit,




Not working properly,

Not helping me in any way,

To fix the problems and torments,

That I carry with me every day,




Growing stronger and stronger,

The lonelier I feel,

The more deserted, and less sociable I become,

Sinks in and makes it all real,




I hate feeling this way,

But it becomes obvious to me,

That I am in no fit state,

To be who I want to be,




I want to be strong and confident,

Feel like I'm worth more,

Feel like I can see the opportunity,

That lies behind every door,




I want to feel like I fit in,

Instead of wishing my life away,

I want to be the strength to be able to,

Want to wake up every day,




Not fall into a bottomless sleep,

And never choose to wake,

Not sink further and further into wishing,

That my existence was fake,




Fake and imaginary,

As it feels like I may well be,

I'm through with emotions and feeling this way,

So blind I can no longer see,




The sense behind all of this,

I want the resolve to tough it out,

The determination and persistence,

To see what my life is about.